Posts Tagged ‘connecting’

The Facebook “Blow-Off”

Wednesday, November 10th, 2010

Facebook has made my life simpler in some ways and complicated at the same time – during the day I can love it and hate it several times depending what is going on.  Then I guess it is not Facebook’s fault, Facebook allows me to see the good and bad in people in more of a constant barrage of information, once again it is the people not the messenger (Facebook) right?

Facebook makes it easy to feel bad that you cannot donate to every cause that people support.  Facebook makes it easy for people to invite people they hardly know to events that they would never invite them to in person, because hey, they like you, but not that much.  Facebook allows people that you “friended” in a weak moment to know what you are doing without becoming involved in your life, giving you support or feedback.  Facebook allows you to invite people (not randomly chosen), to an event many tell you they are coming and they cannot wait – then don’t show.  No call, no email note, nothing to say, “I know I RSVP’ed and you made extra reservations/food, but I cannot make it.”

So what does this tell us?  This isn’t Facebook’s fault.  We have all heard from our parents and perhaps some of us have even said it ourselves, everyday our society seems to be getting just a little more disconnected to the HUMAN side of things.  People give you the finger after they cut you off when you are driving, athletes engage in all out brawls on the fields, tracks and courts, parents post videos on YouTube of kids fighting while they cheer the fighters on.

What is this world coming to?

The other day a friend of mine and I were talking about “Random Acts of Kindness” and how good they make you feel when you do them.  She reminds her kids daily to do ONE nice thing for someone else – no matter how small it may be.  And of course we may say, “Isn’t that sad, to have to be reminded?”  But I say, “Hallelujah!  Parenting is back!”  Don’t ever take for granted what your kids may or may not know, especially when it comes to manners and it also reminds YOU of the importance of common courtesy.

I have another friend that always says, “Thank You.” Even when you aren’t sure it was required, but it is that reminder to me that I need to say it more often if I am questioning if a “Thank You,”  was necessary.  He even says it when he “Blackberry Messages” me.  And now I am making sure I do it too – it makes me feel better seeing it on the screen whether I am getting it or sending it.

Chris Brogan has been saying “Be Human” for a long time and it all sounded good to me, but I wasn’t exactly sure what it meant, the more I become involved and use Social Media tools and the more I see people I know using these tools,  I can really appreciate what “Being Human” means.

So think about doing your part today to say or do something kind for someone. And remind a young person in your life. The more chat rooms, comments on blogs, texting and “facebooking” we do, the less connected we become.  But we still ARE human and we all need to remember that.

What will you do today?

The impersonal, personal side of our digital times

Tuesday, July 7th, 2009

As I typed into my calendar on my laptop this morning the schedule of events I needed to attend in relationship to a recent death of a friend, it seemed weird to type the words “Funeral -(my friends name)” and actually put a “from this time – to that time” and schedule it.

In fact in the past few months, I have had several friends and relatives of friends die and I am feeling as if I may be bad luck or something. I guess it comes with the territory when you have lots of people in your life and you are a “people” person as I admittedly am.

But it brings me back to the biggest fear I have with all this technology around us.

Are we swapping out the greeting card or phone call of support to friends for the Facebook wall view of people you would normally TALK to and CONNECT with?

There is no doubt that Facebook, text messages, etc. have their places in our lives.  They are convenient ways to check in with each other in our all too busy, hustle, bustle world we are in. When I posted my blue mood on my Wall this past Sunday, there was a flurry of people encouraging me and even one surprise guest in my chat box sharing with me a Tao website that I never knew about.  I had no idea how many people checked out my Facebook page and certainly no idea how much those words would mean to me – instantly.

Then it reminded me also, how much I treasure that special note that comes to me in my mailbox (you know the one on your street?), the flowers picked for me out of my friend Marion’s garden that she brought to my office.  The last note I got was from my friend Katy.  I was so touched but her taking the time to buy a card and write me a personal note.

Isn’t that what it is all about anyway?  TIMEConnecting?

We all know time is so precious and the 24 hour day is non-negotiable, but it is “time” that you can share with someone that is truly precious. You are saying, “You matter to me. I care about you.”

So the next time you poke around on Facebook, leave a note behind, just because you see my Wall Post, doesn’t mean I know that you cared enough to think of me and type in my name to see what I have been up to.

Be spontaneous. When you see a friend’s car in the parking lot somewhere – take out a piece of paper (or grab that empty McDonald’s bag in your own car) and write a note and put it under the windshield wiper. Or pick up the phone – WHEN you think of it and even if they arent there, leave a message telling them you were thinking of them. Leave some “footprints” of yourself behind and I promise it will make you feel as warm and as special as it does them!

I promise my next post will be less philosophical and more “brilliant” (ha ha!) and more to the objective of this blog, to be helpful in choosing technology that works for you in your life.  But sometimes technology is just that.  We are humans and we all need hugs, all the gadgets in the world will ever change that!


Google Analytics integration offered by Wordpress Google Analytics Plugin