Struggles of Change

November 17th, 2014

You Mean I have to learn something ELSE?

If you just go down through the entries in this blog you can see there are gaps.  Some BIG ONES!  And of course for a lot of reasons:

1) I am busy with work life.

2) I am busy with home life.

3) I CAN’T THINK!

Strategy?

When you own a business or have a demanding job, it is easy to get trapped in the major task that must get done- NOW.  Then the next day there are several more things that have to be done – NOW.  Then months of things having to be done NOW.   In the meantime, family, friends or unplanned disasters occur.

It is even easier to get trapped in thinking about bailing out the boat as opposed to the best way how to bail a boat.  Sure you may have a dixie cup handy, but perhaps if you can take a minute, you may look up and see a big bucket that is within reach that really gets the job done.  The challenge is  being willing to “look up” and see something outside your peripheral vision that makes the difference between bare survival and success. Winning!

Seth Godin and Chris Brogan

Seth Godin is a famous guy with cool glasses that I listen to and read a lot. Same with Chris Brogan. (Chris doesn’t wear the Godin glasses but he is very cool.)  And each have an amazing gift in seeing things from the 20,000 foot view.  And not only do they see it, they can talk about it in a way that I can relate to-even if it takes a while.  And for me, it has, you know why?

Because I am busy bailing out the boat with a dixie cup!

Seth talks about” Tribes.”  Chris talks about “Community.”  Even before I realized how disconnected to our “Communities or Tribes, ” all this free media available to us, is making us.

10 Years Ago

There was no Facebook for Business, no Pinterest, no Twitter, websites were mostly brochure style and few blogs.  As businesses we were not competing for all the places people were hanging out online, because they weren’t mostly, Netflix and YouTube were fledglings. What hasn’t changed is people have the same 24 hours then that they have today. And they didn’t have smartphones!

Then using traditional methods was OK.  We still reached people using print, tv, radio.  Since then,  we got access, free access to all these media opportunities, kind of a “roll your own.”  And so did our customers and clients.  And in the meantime, we had to learn how to use all this free media.

Did We Get Lost?

In this struggle to learn technology and multiple platforms, while trying to run our businesses, did we lose focus on what we were ultimately trying to do?  Find and communicate with our customer?  Our existing customer, the new one? Where did they go?  Or better yet, where did WE go?

 

Survival Instinct, Communication, Social Media and The Trust Factor

April 9th, 2014

WOW what a mouthful that title is, huh?  Certainly either I lost you with it or I have you wanting more.

When beings are in survival mode certain chemicals are released. It results in certain ways of thinking and actions. The “fight or flight” instinct. The more threatened something feels, the more defensive it gets and of course the more ugly it can get.  If it is you, you are fighting for your life.  Thank Goodness, most of the time we aren’t actually fighting for our lives but certain chemicals are released even when we feel angry or stressed that result in the release of these chemicals in our bodies and brains.  OK enough about physiology…

Jason Falls

A few years ago,  I attended an event where the writer, speaker, trainer,  Jason Falls spoke where he talked about his recent book, “No BullSH*T Social Media   as well as many other amusing and helpful things.  I loved his delivery, I loved his no nonsense style and many parts of what his message was about, still resonate with me.  None more than his segment about, “We cannot lie anymore.  We can’t lie because we will get caught.”  There was much more to this message so taking two sentences is hardly fair, but it is true.  With so many platforms to use and so many of them integrated as well as GPS and cameras everywhere, it is difficult to say we are doing something or are somewhere if we aren’t. Or ARE when we shouldn’t be!

It All Boils Down to “Trust”

At least in my opinion.  For example, if you get a text from someone you really love and think they are funny, if autocorrect interferes or the length of the text is chopped off, you probably give your friend the benefit of the doubt or laugh it off and maybe tease them about it.

On the other hand, someone you may be angry at or have had a disagreement, or just don’t like in general,  posts something on your Facebook wall, how do you take it?  Chances ar,e if you have an element of mistrust or anger with that person, even if they post something that seems completely benign, you may interpret it as negative.  Are they are trying to make up to you in a cowardly way by posting on your wall something nice instead of calling you and flat out apologizing and admitting they were wrong?  Or you see or hear half a story and  you find you fill in the blanks?

What You See Is What You Get  (WYSIWYG)

It is hard for some people to take things at face value without mixing a bunch of emotional baggage in with it.  But social media and anything that is less than “Face to Face” adds an element of doubt to any situation under the best circumstances.  The least number of senses involved in communication allows for the mind to get suspicious if the”wheels are turning” to begin with.

John Wayne

A famous quote by John Wayne is “Shoot First and Ask Questions Later.”  But don’t, step back, take a breath and consider the fact that there is information missing and perhaps a little time will save a lot of trouble.

 

Who is the REAL person on Facebook anyway?

March 25th, 2014

It is difficult for me to go anywhere without some conversation that doesn’t include the word, “FACEBOOK” in it. Many times it is accompanied by rolled eyes or heavy sighs.  Other times it is expressed with gratitude that there was some news shared that people felt important to know about and still other times sad news shared and supportive comments are given.  In every case, I have heard opinions all over the place regarding sharing or “over sharing.”

thumbsupdownHere are a couple examples – not direct quotes but close to it:

  • “If I see one more picture of those dogs (kids) I am going to scream.”
  • “I just love seeing those funny dog (kid) pictures! “
  • “I get to hear about her mother dying on Facebook, I didn’t even know she was sick!”
  • “OMG her mother died, I had no idea – I wonder if they need anything?”
  • “They go to the beach, umbrella drinks and sand, I get to shovel snow.”
  • “Man, all that sun, I wish I could get out of here and put on some shorts!”

There are plenty more but the comments are amusing when you think of it,  it is a demonstration of sociology/psychology right in front of your eyes in REAL TIME!

What Do You Do on Facebook?

If I am having a rough day, there are “friends” of mine on Facebook I visit to get a humorous pick me up. Or, if I have someone on my mind that I know that has been “having it rough,”  I go to their page to encourage them with a couple of humorous or kind words.  But that’s me.

What about you?

If your comments are negative, people see it.  If your comments are positive, people see that too. Only you may not realize that opinions are forming around your comments, posts, etc.    People  may say they don’t care but it seems to be human nature to judge people.  Now with Facebook we have yet ANOTHER way to judge people!  Oh Joy!

YOUR BRAND

If you are trying to “Be” something or “Do” something about or with your life, it isn’t a bad idea to remember that you may be reaching more people that you don’t see every day than those that do see you every day.  The ones that see you, see ALL of you. Your smile, the hug you give someone, your real warm self.  Not a post that they are left to interpret.

A little food for thought.

Don’t Be Afraid to Swim Up Stream

February 25th, 2014

It seems that life has a way to stuff a person into a box.  This box is one that “everybody” is supposed to fit into.  If you are like me you went to a school of the masses, was taught with the masses and expected to learn the masses. Only I didn’t.  Being in college prep because you are good in English doesn’t mean that you are great at all of it.  Math, Science, etc.  In fact most of us aren’t great at all of it. In my opinion and there is science that backs up that there are right brainers and left brainers, but there are tons of articles and research. This post or this blog itself wont be discussing that stuff.

When You Think Differently, It’s Okay

Steve Jobs made the Apple Company because he thought differently.  He got fired a few times and people thought he was difficult to get along with most of the time. Why do you suppose that was?  In my opinion it was because others were expecting him to excel with his creative mind in their rigid environment and it didn’t work.  It didn’t work until they let him do it “his way.”  Also in my opinion, he lacked interpersonal skills, persuasion, etc.  It was easy for the “nay-sayers” to not think kindly of him when he refused to do things “their way,” especially when he knew they were wrong.  As we all know know he was right and he made the whole world see things with “fresh eyes.

Encouragement

If you are a creative thinker bear with those that aren’t.  I realize that it is hard, but try.  Realize that the whole system was designed by non-creatives because the “creative types” were creating  rather than analyzing and building, making 1+1 = 2. Find your own fire and fan it, color your own world, sing your own song.  As creatives you have had to develop the skills to “work around” things to get people to see things your way, to show them something they have never thought of before.

So GO, be YOU because there is only one YOU to share, they are waiting (they may not even know it yet) but you will help make a better world.

What Do You Bring To The Party?

February 12th, 2014

I do not know how to fix my car.  I do not know how to cut my own hair (or anyone else’s for that matter).  There are lots of things I do not know how to do and still more things that I KNOW how to do but don’t make the time to do it or someone that does “it” more than I do may be better and more efficient doing it for me!

It’s All In Your Head

I have been changing up the way I am networking lately.  The endless travel challenges that winter brings makes keeping appointments challenging to say the least.  I am using Social Media, email mining and other things to reconnect with old contacts and friends too.  Lots of these conversations have nothing to do with “HEY BUY MY STUFF!”  That isn’t my style and I resent it when people do that to me !

“Soul” Food

There is nothing more fulfilling for me than talking to an old friend that helps me put things into perspective.  In this case it was an old friend that I have not actually talked to for several years.  Not for any particular reason, but we just went in different directions.  He is now in Virginia and I am in Maine.  He and I will always be able to pick up from where we left off just like it was yesterday.  In our conversation we talked about simpler times in our lives.  He also reminded me of some things I happen to be good at that I take for granted.  I guess I have not changed much since then and the list he gave me hasn’t changed from 1981!

The Go-To 

Yes, I am a “Go-To” person. Because I like people and find everyone interesting,, I attract a lot of people.  He was making fun of some of the “Tom Foolery” I may have on my Facebook wall.  I describe my wall as “The Wild Wild West”  unless it is hurtful or cruel,  what is posted stays there.  It may not be my opinion but it was put there by someone I know and I don’t mind that people see it.  People contact me in all different ways for all different things, many things I know nothing about.  But it is possible that I know someone that knows about it and I can get people together that can help one another.

Social Media

I use Social Media every day. Many days BEFORE I EVEN GET OUT OF BED IN THE MORNING! (TMI, right) ? Some mornings depending on the project, I may be looking at notifications on my phone before my feet hit the floor. It is what I do!  It really is my way of life.  It isn’t everybody’s.  When people ask me about “computer things” I want to say, “I know nothing about that stuff.” But when it is a “social media computer thing, I may know A LOT about that and be able to help.

So what can you bring to the party?

 

Throw Your Hat Into the Ring

February 3rd, 2014

If you are a business owner, fine tuning is always helpful.  It is easy to get stuck into the grind of it all.  I know that I often get so immersed in the day to day of operating, making sure my software is updated, returning calls, networking, etc.  I oftentimes get so wrapped up, I fail to think about my company as an outsider.  Where I want it to go and what my part is in moving it in that direction.

Brain Space
When I am in “tactical mode,” helping customers with their business processes,  I have difficulties thinking big picture on ideas for my company.  And being in innovation and looking for “that special” thing for someone else, there is never a shortage of new technology to try out or learn about.  That part of my brain is always RED HOT, it is easy because I am in it all the time.  I am no neuroscientist but I would venture to guess that my PLANNING part of my brain is different than my tactical part (and I am not even going to bother googling it.)

As a Marketer at heart, (been at it in one way or another for 30 odd years – yikes!).  I love planning.  Planning allows for contemplation of what has happened (or what we did), what we think is going to happen and what we plan to make the best of it.  It also is the place in the company that gets everyone together to decide “What” and “Who” we are as a company and “What we WANT to be?”  Those things don’t happen in Accounting, Sales or HR they happen in Marketing.

Thinking Differently

Think DifferentI am fortunate that I teach Social Media as well as Marketing at Husson University at the New England School of Communications.  I say that I am fortunate because for about 30 weeks a year I get to teach courses on things that Marketing people need to be doing at their companies.  Sure I may have to pick up the mail and make a bank deposit, follow up on Sales calls or client requests, but I am constantly reminded of what needs to happen in Marketing.  That I need to stay connected to that world, to the media in person, on air or through social media.  There are a host of other things that I am reminded to do, because I teach these courses and the feedback from the students is priceless and very helpful to me.

Volunteer
It is possible there may be a way that you may be able to do some work that puts “Planning” on your calendar. Maybe Junior Achievement, Adult Ed, Brownies or Cub Scouts- anything that makes you prepare a presentation of some type that gets you from thinking about your day to day and more into your “Day After Tomorrow.”

*thank you Creative Commons and Apple for the use of their image.

 

What Do You Think About Facebook Posts?

January 24th, 2014

Is there a Facebook YOU and a Real YOU?

There is a woman that I know from a networking group that always tells me how much she loves my Facebook posts. Almost every day that she gets on Facebook, she looks me up to see what funny thing I have to share.  Well it took me back a little.  Here is a professional woman whom I admire immensely, bothers to approach me and tell me what I post starts her day off to a good start.  Stunned.

And for me too, there are those people that I look up to see what kind of snarky, playful fun can be going on because my day isn’t necessarily going the way I wished it was.  As I have written several times in this blog, Facebook is a great escape for people at one point or another during their week.

The Old Fashioned Way

A few years ago I wrote a post about people taking what they see on Facebook at face….VALUE.  And it seems that the same people that use the excuse that they “thought” they knew your life was okay because of what you post on Facebook are probably the same people that wouldn’t call you to find out anyway.  But that is another post for another day.

NEGATIVITY

I have some people that I know in real life, like the ones I see in person often, talk on the phone thumbsupdownto often and they seem like happy normal people.  People that I drink coffee with, have over to my house.  Remember THOSE kinds of people?  Well on a particular day when I was looking for a lift and went to Facebook for my daily dose of fun, I went to one of my friends pages and it was some negative thing about some corporation, I looked again and there was something else until finally after searching for a while, there was something that had nothing to do with the government or something ELSE we have no control over.  I know this person.  I know what a positive loving person they are!  Yet to look at their page, you would think, “Why am I friends with this person?  Which one is real?”

What about the First Amendment?

Now before you get all rabid on me, you are right.  This is an individual’s page and in the spirit of free speech, that page can say whatever they want it to, right?  But I have a dilemma – do I “unfriend” the person because the politics and rampages are just driving me crazy OR do I tell I am going to do it first? And on a philosophical note,  which is my real friend?  The person that I hang out with, laugh and cry with or the person that spews anger through their Facebook posts?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I LOVE those Commercials

January 22nd, 2014

I am sure I have mentioned it either in this blog or another that when I was a child, my grandmother would say, “Kelly, you are the only person I know that runs INTO the room when there is a commercial on TV.”  She was right.  Then and now I still find commercials interesting.

Jingles

I can still sing the Shaeffer  Beer Commercial in my head.  I know that music/sound can engage certain parts of your brain so you remember things better.  I am no psychologist but I know that for me often songs that I absolutely hate become that song that plays over and over and over in my head and I cannot get it out!

It’s Only Weird If it Doesn’t Work

Anheuser Busch has been doing a series of these commercials which I cannot help but love.  There isn’t a jingle in this particular in this ad but as part of this series they have used a song from a jukebox at at bar.  If you like the song it is nice to hear it again, if you don’t like the song the story with the commercial makes you laugh.  Makes it memorable.  Clearly Paula Cole probably didn’t have this in mind when she first released the song.  (I heart Paula Cole, btw.)

Being Open to New Things

Even though it may seem like it by this post, my life isn’t about beer commercials.  It’s about thinking differently. And just like that commercial for Apple Computer that applauds innovation being world changing, what about your own life changing?

Being open is a developing into mindset for me.  I have had many people around me die or get seriously il . In these times, people always seem to come up with a “Bucket List.”  The list of things you always Photo Credit "Image courtesy of  "Time" by Salvatore Vuono  / FreeDigitalPhotos.netwanted to do that you never did because of… fear?  Now that a person has something LIFE ALTERING, is now the time to do it?  You decide, Like Paula Cole, “I Don’t Wanna Wait.”

What Are YOU Waiting For?

 

 

*Image courtesy  “Time” by Salvatore Vuono / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

What is my Personal Brand?

January 16th, 2014

Not Your Mothers MenopauseI’m a business owner, a dog owner, a gun owner, an aunt, a sister, a daughter, a friend. So many different things, to so many people but who am I to me?  Who do I want to be the most? The last 11 years, I have been an owner of Sephone. And all of my life I have been a marketing person.  I think “like that” all the time because I am in it all the time.  Being part of Sephone Interactive Media, I have been fortunate to learn so many things about online marketing and social media.  I have been able to be on the ground floor. When we started, Sephone, the idea of someone without web skills punching in text was unimaginable to so many people.  So many people other than my partners at Sephone.  They knew, I believed  (and still do) and here we are!

I love people, I love to help and I love to tell stories.  About 8 years ago, I met a woman named Deb. Deb Neuman is a very inspiring woman.  Never afraid to try something new. Never intimidated to be around other driven out of the box thinking women.  Over the years, we have helped one another, cried, laughed and had a blast doing it all.  We both have grown and changed along the way.

Deb and Kelly doing Back to Business Radio Show

Deb and Kelly doing Back to Business Radio Show

Deb has been the State of Maine Deputy Commissioner of Economic Development, a “media head” writing columns for newspapers, blogs, she has her own syndicated radio show and she is currently on the air today. She has been a small business owner, has a cottage industry going and she STILL gets people together. She has connected me with countless people as I have  her.

As “50 Something”  women we are working on a project,  Not Your Mother’s Menopause, This blog has grouped some writing women  and some experts that can write. We share experiences of all kinds to other women or people that are feeling like us.  There are so many writers and topics it is easy to find some you like and identify with.

Personally I am sharing stories from my life from 50 + and how I have been on the road to making changes in my life.  Yoga, Hypnosis, Meditation, stuff like that.  I also talk about how 5 years ago I never would believe that I would be doing this!  We are getting lots of visitors and lots of interest from all over the world. I am finding that this writing that I am jumpstarting my own writing again.  Once again Deb gets me moving in the direction I need to go in and want to go in but need that little shove to do it. Thanks GF!

This blog will still go on and GROW on because of Not Your Mother’s Menopause and all the great chemistry of all these great women!  Have ideas of what you may want to see?  Shoot me an email and THANKS!!

Why Do People Spend So Much Time on Facebook?

December 5th, 2013

I thought about giving a bunch of stats on how much time people spend on Facebook, how many pages people look at, how many friends they have.  But then I thought to myself “The amount of time is staggering, who needs to see those numbers again?” Rather than griping and sniping about people being distracted or not getting their work done BECAUSE of Facebook – I say this with tongue in cheek, as humans we CHOOSE to use Facebook as a distraction.

Distraction

From work, from life – to work, to life.  Facebook has it all.  People we LOVE  we can connect to and laugh with because we are stressed or worried. Or to gripe about “that guy” that just stole our lunch again out of the company fridge or “that guy” has left his lunch IN the company fridge TOO LONG.  You can see it all on Facebook and the numbers I am not citing here prove it but you know it all ready, you do it, I do it, we all do it.

What Does This Mean?

Advertisers know about you because Facebook asks you certain questions and tracks your every move so they can make money based on your habits.  Yes. The ads you see are based on this behavior.  AND if you have a business, perhaps this is an option where you should advertise. But what does it REALLY mean in the grand scheme of things?

Connection, Caring, Love, Laughter

We all love to do the things that make us happy and often times we even love to do the things that don’t make us happy. The RUSH of it all, make us mad, fire us up, we cannot get enough of it.  Or if you are me, I cannot get enough of seeing it happen on someone else’s wall, I watch until I cannot take it anymore.  But I do it.  A distraction.  Also someone posts that their dog died, their child is sick, I reach out in support, share comfort. Makes me feel like I am doing something that matters to someone.

We Are Human

If you participate in “Buy Local” then you probably go to some stores with owners that you know.  Or people in your neighborhood at home or work that you would like to know.  Maybe you know them on Facebook, maybe not.  If the store  has stuff you like, you may go there but I find myself going to places because it is the people I like.  I like them, their stories they are part of my life.  I like the connection. I want the connection, don’t you?

Same Old Story Same Ole Song and Dance

I have written several times about using Social Media in addition to cultivating friendships and business relationships.  Not instead of “people to people” connection.  A dirtbag in real life often is a dirtbag on Facebook, it may be harder to spot but eventually the real person is revealed.  It comes down to being a member of the human race, reaching out and wanting connection.  OR DISCONNECTION.  Real life is blowing up and you can run to Facebook for help and support.

But let’s not forget we are people first and not technology.  Besides computers hug funny.

 


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